Luka Anya - 3 months old

Really sorry this has taken me longer than expected!

I'm going to either {A} have to write these in advance, or {B} do them in the early hours if the morning...which is what I'm doing right now.

It's 3:43am, that's OK :P

A sad moment a few weeks ago, I went through all of Luka's clothes and had to store away a few things as she's gotten too big for them :-(

They were some of my faves on her too, she's gone from fitting size 0000's to fitting 000's and almost 00's comfortably :-)

Soooo heartbreaking!!! But also a huge milestone for her as she hasn't gone through any growth spurts lately.

This last month I've seen Luka take shape and starting to mold into her own little person.

It's crazy beautiful but very bitter sweet.

You want more than anything for you're child to grow and be independent but I think back to the womb and how we were so 'connected'.

I want to continue a strong relationship with Luka, we have such a strong bond even now and have our own little language only a mother and child can have.

I've had my share of lows with Luka, frustrations, anxiety, desperation, depression you name it!

But when I get into a funk I think of little smiles, our little rituals together and all the bad fades and the magic is back :-)

This photo was taken in February on our trip to Dunedin. Will post on that later...

Weight: Luka was last weighed about 2-3weeks ago at 4.5kg. She's getting so big and has the most scrummy thigh rolls! She'll be weighed again in a few weeks so I'll put that through on her next update :-) 

Sleep: Her sleep patterns during the day are pretty irregular ranging from 20mins to an hour with every 1hour to 2hour awake period. Night time she sleeps amazingly! Shes goes to bed on or before 8:30pm and wakes at around 9 or 10 for her 'dream feed' which put her back to sleep. She may wake once during the night for some milk but otherwise she sleeps through till about 6am :-)

Diet:  Shes still on the breast but I'm going to slowly start transitioning her onto formula so she's 50/50 but not completely on formula just incase if I'm to get really sick or something comes up and I can't feed her she'll be confident on the bottle.

Which is another thing, I didn't keep up with using the bottle so now I'm having to retrain her to use that as well as the breast. It's getting easier but it's had it's challenges!

Crying: Her crying is persisting when she's had enough of playtime, feeding, sleeping, getting changed or if she just has a bit of wind or reflux or she's due for a nap.

I absolutely hate her cry with a passion, I have to be honest, and I think every mother can relate!

Her cry is AWFUL! You have to really be around it all day to understand what I mean, it's generally high pitched and ear piercing no matter what and it does drive me crazy, especially when I can't settle her, so lately I've just had to leave her in her bed and walk away for a few minutes as I have reached my breaking point a few times.

It doesn't mean I love Luka less, but being with it 24/7 tends to get a bit much and very isolating, sorry but I'm not going to sugar coat anything it's just how it is, fortunately it will get better as she gets older.

Social: Since Luka's eyesight has developed she can see people more better and does interact by smiling and looking. Next week I'm going to check out some local playgroups to get her interacting with babies and children so that when I decided to put her into daycare it's not such a shock to her.

She does tend to get quite bored at home so I try to go out with her as much as I can to stimulate her and tire her out otherwise she's just frustrated. She's very active so play groups will be very good for her :-)

Milestones: 

• Talking! Luka's started having small baby conversations, it's so cute I can't help but grin ear to ear which also makes Luka smile so were both smiling and having a great time which makes her talk even more :-)
• Movement. She can move! When I'm carrying her or when she's laying on the floor she squirms and jerks her legs and arms around it's so funny and adorable! I even grab her legs and move them around how she does and she gets the biggest smiles on her face :-) I called her 'Irish Dancing' hehe. Oh and during playtime she's starting to hold her head up tremendously and is trying to roll herself over.
• Sleep. She sleeps through the night now, if not a few wake periods here and there but the don't last very long and she's back to sleep.
• Travelling. Luka used to hate being in her pram but now she's settled into a bit more thank goodness! If she does get fussy being in there I put her in the front carrier so she can have a look around at everything, works like a charm and it also gives people a good look at her too. We get a lot of smiles and"'oh she is soo cute!!!" when were out :-)
• Grabbing. Luka's hands are starting to strengthen and she's grabbing things and fulfilling her curiosity a lot more :-)

Postpartum: I've had a lot of ups and downs this last month with my hormones regulating, getting my period again (sorry TMI) and then not getting which freaked me out but then realising that I'm breast feeding, trying to remain patient etc etc and that it has overwhelmed me quite a bit and caused a bit of depression but I'm getting through it day by day.

I think lack of exercise is making me feel a bit down too, I loved going to the gym and miss it terribly but now I just don't have the time or that discipline to carry on working out outside of the gym anymore.

I go for walks and runs but that's every two weeks or when i can be bothered, I also have a gym ball and kettle bell at home but when Lukas sleeping I'm either chilling out, doing thing around the house or eating. I think about it all the time, but for the time being it'll be in the 'too hard' box until I can be bothered again.

I haven't noticed any weight gain though, my clothes have gotten a bit looser but I'm just lacking in muscle tone.

I've had a few breakouts too but that's been easily fixed with breast milk! It's liquid gold and the milk that dribbles down bubs face i scoop it up and dab it around my eyes and blemishes, it's worked a treat!

I've also got into thinking of returning back to work. With getting bub used to the bottle again I'll be able to do late nights and maybe a day in the weekend at work {gotta love retail} while Andrei takes care of her. I miss my work mates, the shoes and the money and no doubt I'll have withdrawals from being away from Luka but I'll feel like I'm doing good by her as I'll be earning again and be able to give her more, plus be able to start her in daycare.

I've started pumping milk again, I aim for 3times a day to get a good supply up plus using it to help Luka on the bottle, she's already good with formula I use S-26 Newborn she had a reaction to Karicare, my supply has risen so I'm looking toward to pumping around 3ounces within 30mins rather than 1.5ounces!

So that's Lukas 3rd month in a nutshell, her 4th month is just around the corner so I'll update in that pretty soon and plus some.

Until next time!

XOXOX