During the last 6months of knowing about my pregnancy and even before that I have been constantly on the go.
I've made time for myself and had my days off to relax, but in all honesty, as much as my body has slowed down my brain has not.
Heck I don't even know how I've remembered to breathe all this time!
This week the work gods have blessed me with 4days off to do absolutely anything I want.
And so far all I've done is sleep in, go on Facebook, Pinterest, general online browsing, gas bag with my mum, read, eat and just laze.
Throughout this whole time I have been as stubborn as a mule and not wanted to put my feet up and be one of those 'lazy pregnant women' that gets everyone else to do their work for them.
I've continued to push myself at work, gym and in my own life not fully realising I was running on fumes till just the other day when the first thing I thought of when I woke up was "OK, time to hit the gym", but then a little voice inside my head said "Hmmm you've worked pretty hard up until this point, why don't you sleep in?".
And sleep in I did, and I fully don't regret it cause I had no idea how much I needed it!
I've noticed my skin is glowing, hair has more thickness and lustre and I feel amazing :-)
With my belly being so big and tight now I can feel every single movement so well that Luka makes and I am (gulp) starting to waddle :-( (I like to think I'm waddling 'gracefully', but lets face it, pregnancy in the last trimester is anything but graceful)
And it's no wonder, I am carrying and extra 10kgs on my body! Plus most of Luka's body has developed and she's depositing fat which is taking up so much room in my tiny body it is leaving me breathless, exhausted, needing to pee every 10mins and putting strain on my back.
I am so happy that I've timed it right to go on maternity leave at the end of next week cause anything longer and I think I'd pass out!
I may sound like I need to harden up, but until you go through it yourself you really have no idea!
Don't get me wrong, I love being pregnant and it has been a fantastic pregnancy, my midwife even said that I have been the easiest patient she's had to date!
Hmm we'll see how I go in labour.....
It was so easy up until now. I've had huge problems coming to terms with pregnancy because prior to that I was always 'GO GO GO!' and full of energy I just totally underestimated how much energy it took to grow a baby. I almost feel like I'm back in the first trimester when I was so tired and slowed right down, I felt so guilty that I was letting my family and work colleagues down when I actually wasn't and I do kinda feel a little like that now but having this time off to think about it I've actually let myself down by expecting way too much from myself.
What can I say? I am my own worst critic.
I'm just glad that I've finally realized that this is my time to relax and let rest take care of itself. I have a mum that has been helping and a wonderful boyfriend that has been nothing but amazing this whole time so I may as well take advantage of it while I can!
After all, I only have 2 more months left to go before mine and Andrei's world is changed forever may be even less...
So that's my little rant for today, sometimes the only way to get out what you feel is by writing it.
**Images found via my Pinterest account